þ7ÎYƒÎTiTiViViViViViViViVi”Vý"WWDYcYcYc YƒYƒYƒYƒ Part Five Patterns of Islamic Personal and Communal Life Chapter 12 The Islamic Life Cycle and the Family Islamic Domestic Rites, Ceremonies, and Customs As we have seen throughout this book, Islam is a complete way of life and not merely a system of belief and ritual practices. This chapter will treat some of the more down-to-earth customs of Islamic life, beyond either the obligatory ritual duties of worship and the other pillars or the somewhat rarefied world of Sufism and its related activities. Instead, our interest will be on such things as birth, naming, education, and childhood; entry into adult status and marriage; marital responsibilities and privileges and the raising of children; divorce and remarriage; the structure and function of the Muslim family at both the nuclear and extended levels; the inheritance of property; death and the rites connected with it; and everyday domestic activities such as sleeping, eating, and entertaining visitors. The following chapter will take us out into the street and the wider community of Muslims to be found in the mosque, occupational contexts, markets, cafŽs, schools, entertainment and sports, and other public settings. It will also deal with the relations between Islamic beliefs and observances and popular, regional attitudes and practices. Rites of Infancy and Childhood Birthing There is no QurÕanically prescribed rite connected with birth or the first period of life, but there are certain h.adõøths and customs concerning what Muslims should do. As soon as a child is born and after it has been washed and swaddled, some male, either a religious guide or a relative, pronounces the call to prayer (adhaøn) in the babyÕs right ear and the call to perform the prayer (iqaøma) in the left, in imitation of Muhammad, who is reported to have done this on the occasion of the birth of Hasan, his grandson. Then, again following the ProphetÕs example, the same person chews a small amount of date flesh and then puts the softened morsel into the babyÕs mouth. This marks the first feeding outside the womb and with the mouth. Then the Fatiha is recited for the protection and health of the infant, and people come bearing gifts. The seventh day after birth is important, for this is when the child is usually named and a sacrifice is often performed, although it is not absolutely required. The Ôaqõøqa sacrifice, as it is known, dates back to pre-Islamic Arabia. The word Ôaqõøqa refers to the infantÕs hair, which is shaved off and weighed, after which an equivalent amount of silver is given as alms. The sacrifice consists of two male sheep or goats for a boy and one for a girl. This reflects a notion of the comparative superiority of males over females, and although the birth of either a girl or boy is an occasion for rejoicing, the birth of a boy is especially auspicious and satisfying. Naming Although the naming may be done at birth, it is very often done on the same day as the Ôaqõøqa. People name their children after relatives, or saints, or sometimes auspicious events. But it is most common to follow the ProphetÕs suggestions, which include ÔAbdallaøh, ÒSlave of God,Ó ÔAbd al-Rahmaøn, ÒSlave of the Merciful,Ó the names most loved by God, and MuhammadÕs own name as well as those of his family and companions. Muhammad did not allow the use of both his given name and his surname (AbuøÕl-Qaøsim, ÒFather of QaøsimÓ), but either one or the other. The infant is given his or her own name, but there are other names that the individual will acquire over time. For example, when one has become a parent, one is entitled to use the kunya, an honorific name, prefaced by Abuø, Òfather,Ó or Umm, Òmother.Ó The child bears a nasab, either Ibn, Òson of,Ó or Bint, Òdaughter of.Ó Thus, Abuø Zayd is ÒFather of Zayd,Ó Umm Zaynab is ÒMother of Zaynab,Ó Ibn ÔUmar is ÒSon of ÔUmarÓ and Bint Ahmad, ÒDaughter of Ahmad,Ó and so forth. Another type of name is the laqab, an honorific or nickname that is acquired through special circumstances such as superior accomplishment, a trade, or something unusual. An example of the first would be Abuø Õl-Fityaøn, ÒChampion Bruiser,Ó given to Sõødõø Ahmad al-Badawõø for his skill in the martial arts. An example of the second could be al-Hallaøj, the ÒCarder,Ó namely, of wool (although this became a laqab with a double meaning as ÒcarderÓ of hearts). The third type could be something like al-Jaøhiz, the ÒGoggle-eyed,Ó a nickname actually given to one of the greatest prose writers of Abbasid times. There are also names that indicate the place of origin or some other special association. Abuø Haømid al-Ghazaølõø, for example, means Abuø Haømid from Ghazaøla, the town in which he was born and reared and to which he later returned. Such a name is called nisba. Because so many Muslims bear the old Arabic names of early Islam, it is sometimes difficult to identify individuals precisely. Because of this practice, other names in addition to the given names are especially useful. In addition to Muhammad and the names of the companions, the names of the prophets contained in both the Bible and the QurÕan are held in esteem. A well-known h.adõøth says, concerning the use of the ProphetÕs name: ÒThere is no people holding a consultation at which there is present one whose name is Muhammad or Ahmad, but God blesseth all that assembly.Ó1 The naming of the child is not actually part of the Ôaqõøqa ceremony and does not even have to be done on the seventh day but may be done shortly after birth or on the eighth day, if the birth occurred in the afternoon. On the fortieth day after the birth the mother is purified and thus able to resume the ritual duties from which she was excused during her pregnancy, parturition, and confinement. This is an important day in the lives of both mother and child, and there is often festivity connected with it. Learning the QurÕan As soon as the young one begins to talk, he or she is taught the basmala and other simple phrases and devotional formulas. Traditional schooling was centered in the QurÕan, which became the textbook for countless millions of people over the centuries. Traditionally, the child started learning how to read the QurÕan at about age seven. It is impossible to overestimate the significance of this in ingraining Islamic values and attitudes, which have always also been inseparable from the linguistic and literary forms in which they were originally revealed. Nowadays, most Muslim children go to modern schools, but if the dominant ethos of the region is Islamic, they will be taught something about the QurÕan and its proper recitation, sometimes in optional afterschool sessions. Circumcision of Boys Often, Muslim boys pass through their major status changeÑcircumcision (khitaøn)Ñwhen they have recited the entire QurÕan once through. In Malaysia and other regions where this procedure is followed, the boy undergoes the operation at from ten to twelve years of age. It is thus a real puberty rite, separating the boy from childhood and introducing him into a new, higher status. There is much anxious anticipation of circumcision at the age of puberty, because the initiand is increasingly aware of his own sexuality and needs also to demonstrate his bravery and honor. The adults talk a lot about the fearsomeness of the circumciser and make frightening remarks right up to the time of the event, which in some cases is semipublic, although it is more and more often performed in a clinic or hospital.2 In any event, there is much festivity, with music, special foods, and many guests. While the actual event is taking place, one may hear praise of God, partly, as some observers have suggested, to drown out the boyÕs cries. But the procedure is relatively safe, and those who perform it are usually trained and experienced. I have witnessed very peremptory circumcision operations in small booths close to the wall of the great Tanta mosque in Egypt during the autumn mawlid or birthday celebration of the saint, Sõødõø Ahmad al-Badawõø. There, peasant parents simply bring their little boys, from infancy up to ages seven or eight, and the circumciser and usually an assistant hold the boy down while his foreskin is removed. Sometimes a man plays on a flute or beats a drum. Afterward the child will be given sweets, like ice cream, and paraded off in honor and triumph as if he were a little prince. Whether the celebration is makeshift and humble or ceremonious and lavish, it is a significant moment in the life of a boy and his parents and siblings. Afterward, if the circumcision takes place around puberty, the boy will enter into full participation in Islamic ritual life, although he may have performed prayers and fasting before, either regularly or occasionally. Circumcision is not mentioned in the QurÕan, but Muslims everywhere regard it as essential, and the Hadith record it as a practice enjoyed by all past prophets.3 Significantly, it is also known by a euphemism: t.ahaøra, meaning Òpurification.Ó The age at which it is performed varies from region to region and even from family to family, but most often age seven is preferred, although it is known from as early as the seventh day following birth all the way up to puberty. Adult converts to Islam have traditionally been required to undergo the operation, but this practice is not universally considered to be essential, especially if there is a health risk. Of course, in the Bible there are reports of circumcisions of adult males and mention of the period of healing that was required afterwards (for exa...
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